It’s the moment you realize that you enjoy nothing that you once did. The moment you’ve lost interest in your favorite sports teams. The moment your favorite activities bring no joy to you at all. It’s the moment you realize that any news you hear, no matter what, is bad news. It’s when you are completely consumed by sadness and despair. It’s when you are totally living every minute with no hope and a heart full of pain, anger and sadness. It’s the moment you turn around realize that the ones that were once there for support have vanished.
It’s the waking up every morning and seeing all the pain that your loved ones are in. It’s the realization the damage you’ve caused to other people including yourself. It’s the feeling that you have when you’re abandoned by your parents and realize they have never truly been there for your. It’s when your darkest days continue to get darker and the light of life gets dimmer to nonexistent.
It’s the moment you feel all of your prayers go unanswered and you feel spiritually abandoned. It’s that moment that you realize the ones that you use to turn to for spiritual support have turned their back on you. The moment you realize those that you once considered friends are nowhere to be found.
It’s that moment you realize how alone you are. The moment you realize you’re just going through the motions. The moment you realize how lifeless your life truly is. The moment you realize how little to no control you truly have on your life. It’s when your goals and dreams that have not been achieved, have become painful reminders of a life that could have been, but never will be.
It’s the moment you realize your kindness has been viewed as gullibility and your compassion as a flaw. It’s the moment you realize your value has been based off of what you do and not what you stand for. Yes that moment has come in my life. The moment I have realized all of this and more. My heart is shattered. My spirit is broken. My faith has been truly damaged.
I have been fighting the battle of darkness for years if not decades. I have realized the false, heartless and hypocritical actions of others. I have realized the true kindness and caring in me.
Most of all it’s the moment that you realize that God truly does exist. The moment you do realize He has granted you another day. Another day to redeem yourself. Another day to make a difference no matter how big or small. Another day to thank Him for the good and ask for help with the bad. Another day that He grants us to work on fulfilling our goals and achieving our dreams. It is the moment that we realize that ALL things are connected and they are connected through Him. Today is that day. Today is the day I have truly realized HIM.
Dear Heavenly Father,
Today I realized the difficulties of life are only as difficult as I perceive.
I want to thank you for opening my eyes to Your Love and Compassion.
I want to thank you for the opportunity you have given me to change the course of my life.
I ask that you comfort my mother-in-law as she prepares to enter your kingdom.
Please comfort my wife as she struggles being her parents sole support.
The dark time of my life has been made a little brighter by You and
I pray that you continue protecting me.
I ask all of this in Jesus name.